I will write later… hours later and days and months apart from the last thought that I wrote and here I am. Full of something… is it energy, is it sadness, is it contemplation, is it fruitfulness, is it awakening, is it turning, is it speculation, is it gentleness, or is it love? My unknowing has left me depleted in many ways but yet, I have the strongest desire to press on, at least most days.
My mind wanders in the night and sometimes in the day, and I love the windows being open with the crisp breeze that strongly comes in while my heater is on 72 degrees. It’s just enough heat combined with the air. I stay wrapped in my blanket while my face sits out the window looking at the stars reminiscent as to when I was a young girl. Habits that you never fully step away from, some good and some always a struggle. But what’s life without one? Heaven!